The Woman on the Beast Page 18

  “Look at that, a female Nazi! You look so fucking radical, Mom. I mean, Hitler would totally ask you out right now if he was alive. But, I’m sure he’s already flown like a dove up to the gates of Hell.”

  What a bunch of damned nuts, Atticus thought.

  God? The Devil? How elementary.

  It amazed him how the silliest of things could instill so much fear in people. They really were like cattle that could get spooked by as much as a passing car.

  The swastika … it’s just missing something. I can’t put my finger on it …

  “Ah ha! You are mystery the whore and you are riding the beast! You need the mark of the beast!”

  Now Atticus was cracking up.

  He no more believed in the mark of the beast than the tooth fairy, but it was just so funny.

  “I’m so glad I made such a large swastika! Now, I can fit 666 straight across your forehead without messing up its snazzy design. It’s the Season of 666, Mommy Dearest, and you’re the leader of the pack. You must be so proud of yourself, Queen Mystery!”

  He turned off the English patient. Now it was even getting on his nerves.

  He reached for the mp3 player and played Flawless by Beyonce instead.

  He sang along with the lyrics as he started carving the 666 with the scalpel.

  “I woke up like this …. I woke up like this … flawless!”

  “Uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuaaaaaoooooooeeeeeeehhhh!”

  “Oh, Mom! You sound like a retarded little baby bird. Stop trying to thank me. I know you’re grateful.”

  “Ahhhhuuuuussssssssssshhheeeeeeeee ….”

  “And you know what else, Mommy? Since you’re getting ready to fly to the gates of Hell to meet Satan, NOW, he’ll KNOW that you’re his true queen.”

  He stopped singing but continued to whistle Flawless as he carved the three sixes deep into her forehead. He knew the deeper he carved, the more likely the scars would form keloids, and that was his ultimate aesthetic goal.

  “I want your beauty to really make a statement, and for that, your 666 needs to be written in a very bold skin font.”

  He took a deep breath.

  As much as he was enjoying torturing her, he actually was getting a little winded.

  “I’m tired, Mommy. I think I’ll go tuck myself in on the floor. You know? The floor. The same place you made me sleep every night of my life. All that cash and couldn’t afford to buy your son a bed. What a great mother!”

  He blazed back over the incisions way too thickly with the cauterization tool. He even vibrated his hand ever so slightly to give the scars a creepy jittery look just like a scary Halloween font.

  “You know what I wanna be when I grow up? A farmer. I want to brand all the cattle in the world. They’re just like you. They are all just following each other in a big stupid herd. Yup. You can be a Nazi supermodel and I’ll be a human cattle farmer. Uh, I’m exhausted. I don’t know how the surgeons do it.”

  He dropped his bloody scalpel onto his metal table with a clink. He could always sterilize it tomorrow. He made sure to add antibiotics to her I.V.

  Couldn’t have Mommy Dearest getting an infection.

  He made sure to hit the repeat button on Flawless before skipping upstairs like a Christmas elf.

  Still merrily singing, “I woke up like this! I woke up like this! Oooooouuuuh! FLAWLESS!”

  DAPHNE’S DISTRESS

  She was crying so hard she could barely talk.

  “Haiku, what are we going to do? Everybody’s dying of Ebola. Suicide bombs going off everywhere, and I’m about to have a baby!” she sobbed.

  “Don’t worry, Daphne. You and the baby will be safe. You have my word.”

  Haiku was lying again and they all knew it.

  There was nothing more dangerous than leaving her pregnant and alone with Sam’s dumb blonde ass and she knew it, but he didn’t have a choice.

  Now tears were leaking out of her red eyes like a leaky faucet and dripping onto her big Buddha belly.

  Sam was rubbing her shoulders in an attempt to calm her down, but his efforts were only making her resent him more.

  Haiku turned the news off.

  “No more news for you, Mommy,” Haiku chirped with a completely false sense of cheer.

  She glared at him as if he’d just shot her puppy.

  “Will you just calm down and trust me, Daphne? Stress kills babies.”

  It was killing Haiku to lie, but he’d been doing it all day and was finally becoming used to it.

  Daphne quickly dried up her tears and lifted her chin.

  Sure, Sam was probably going to accidentally kill the baby while delivering it, but she wasn’t going to help him out any by stressing. Haiku was right.

  “Sam, I need you and Daphne to go underground.”

  Haiku would have taken her down much sooner, but he noticed that all of the enemies attacks had conveniently taken place everywhere but the south.

  Wherever this fucker is, he’s somewhere within’ my reach.

  “How could you leave me like this, Haiku?” Daphne let out one last desperate plea as she lowered down through the trap door, barely fitting as a result of her gigantic pregnant belly.

  Now Haiku had no choice but to take command again.

  “Daphne, shut the fuck up, calm down, and stop stressing out our baby, O.K.? When the trap door shuts it will lock and you’ll be safe inside. I’m the only one who can get in. You can’t leave, but you have everything you need down there. You have all the supplies you need down there, even a labor and delivery room with an IV of pain medicine if you deliver. There is also a hot tub. That might be easier, but I’ll leave that up to you. Babies tend to come out on their own, and I do know that Sam is capable of cutting a chord.”

  Sam looked even more terrified than Daphne.

  “But Haiku, what if she needs a C-section?”

  The correct answer would have been, “Then Daphne and the baby will both die because you’re an idiot,” but Haiku had to lie yet again.

  “Then you’ll be just fine. It’s just like gutting a deer, except you take the baby out, and then put the organs back in. I left a hand-written manual on how to give a C-section for dummies. My instructions make it so simple, even a blonde can do it.”

  “Haiku! You can’t let Sam deliver my baby! I need YOU!”

  “She’s right, Haiku. I’m not baby-delivering material.”

  “Shut the fuck up and go down there. You’re wasting valuable time. The sooner I leave, the sooner I’ll be back. There is a walkie talkie down there you can contact me on. Believe it or not, that walkie-talkie will reach me in France, where I can talk you through the delivery. I amped up some old technology a bit and it really does work. It’s fuzzy, but good enough.”

  Haiku snatched Daphne’s cell phone in a second.

  “Cell phones and computers are not allowed. Now Go! And buck the fuck up you two! We haven’t got time for pussy shit right now!”

  MISSING MONEY MATTERS

  The United Nations contacted leaders of all nations at war and demanded immediate negotiations for a peace treaty via a secret untelevised conference call.

  Every leader of every nation at war showed up to talk business. Losing 56 trillion dollars from secret offshore bank accounts had a way of making people show up, even if only via computer screens.

  Prime Minister Williams spoke for the Freedom Forces first, passing his message through a translator.

  “We demand that you stop your terrorist attacks on our people before we are forced to retaliate with heavy collateral damage.”

  Collateral damage was a clever politician’s fancy way of saying, “killing the innocent civilians.”

  Politicians knew civilians were too dumb to ever figure that out.

  The No Surrender Squad’s leaders were already tucked safely underground and didn’t appear to care very much about their civilians left above ground at all.

  China spoke for the No Surrender Squad first. Although he coul
d speak English, his words were being translated for the leaders of the other countries who could not.

  He spoke English because he was speaking to President Matthews. He did not even look in the direction of Prime Minister Williams, who was the leader of the Freedom Forces.

  “President Matthews, we will stop attacks when you return the money you stole from our bank accounts. We know the United States did it because you left a trail.”

  “We didn’t take your money. A computer hacker did, and he left a phony trail back to us. All the money is gone from all offshore bank accounts everywhere, including the bank accounts of the nations in the Freedom Forces. Can’t you see that everyone was tricked? No ones national security is safe now. Not ours or yours. He can access all your networks and change information in any way he chooses.”

  The Chinese president looked at President Matthews as if he’d just told him the earth was square and made of Swiss cheese. Every leader of every nation in the No Surrender Squad shook their heads in disbelief at his explanation. Their angry faces were as stalwart and hardened as Communist statues.

  Secretly, President Matthews felt a sense of relief. Those guys really want their money back, and so if they had captured Ashley, no doubt they’d be trying to use her like a poker chip. Haiku’s right. Ashley IS alive, he thought to himself over and over.

  China replied, “We know the thief is an American.”

  Now even the leaders of the Freedom Forces’ nations were glaring at him and President Matthews found himself on the witness stand before them all.

  “We cannot find him, sir. He is hacking us all from an invisible I.P. address. We do not know who he is.”

  The Chinese president quickly retorted, “Isn’t that your problem, President Matthews?”

  Wow, these guys are a fun crowd, thought President Matthews.

  “We are working as quickly as possible to find him, and we will return your money as soon as he is apprehended.”

  That answer was not good enough - not good enough for anybody.

  Now, Prime Minister Williams interjected, “We don’t have your money and we can’t give you ours because OURS was stolen, too.”

  The No Surrender Squad did not believe either leader and were not willing to except their pathetic excuses.

  Now the Chinese president spoke with fury.

  “The person who stole our money IS an American and that is YOUR job to find them, not OURS. If you cannot do that and return our money to us, we have nothing more to say.”

  President Matthews wasn’t surprised by their unwillingness to negotiate.

  Losing money had a way of bringing out the worst in people, but so did losing a daughter.

  Now President Matthews responded angrily.

  “I believe someone from YOUR nations may have kidnapped my daughter. If we set off all of the nuclear weapons we have, you will never be able to come back from your holes underground.”

  Now the United Nations Leader interrupted, “With all due respect, Mr. President, our countries are located on the same side of the planet, and we would appreciate it if you’d come to your senses and lower your threat level. If you take such measures, we will be forced to enforce sanctions AND dismiss your country from our team of noble nations.”

  Noble nations? Really?

  President Matthews had to lock his jaw to keep from spouting off. If there was one thing his momma had taught him, it was when to shut up.

  He said nothing.

  Now, the tension between the leaders was thick enough to be cut with a knife.

  The Chinese president broke the silence with a demanding ultimatum.

  “Either you have our money, or you should repay us with your own money, because it is your fault that you cannot find the American who did this, not ours.”

  It wasn’t surprising to President Matthews that the topic of the meeting was money. It wasn’t civilian lives, or nuclear threats.

  Neither the Freedom Forces nor The No Surrender Squad as much as offered him assistance in the investigation of Ashley’s disappearance. He couldn’t tell them the truth – that he felt like nuking them all, and so he shut the Hell up. President Matthews had absolutely NOTHING else to say, and neither did anyone else.

  “When you are ready to give us back our money, we will be ready to talk peace,” China barked before every nation in the No Surrender Squad hung up their calls at the same time, leaving only the Freedom Forces and the United Nations.

  Prime Minister Williams now addressed President Matthews on behalf of the Freedom Forces, “Mr. President, we request you send 200,000 troops to assist us as we are in close proximity with these terrorist nations and require all of our nations to participate.”

  “With all due respect, sir, no one has offered me assistance to help me find my daughter who is currently lost abroad in your continent. Furthermore, we have had our hands full with our own crippling Ebola disaster which has resulted in far more casualties than you’ve lost, and the death toll is continuing to mount exponentially daily.”

  Prime Minister William’s answer was a surprise to President Matthews.

  “President Matthews, a terrorist from your nation stole their money and our money, yet you say you know nothing about it and can do nothing about it. Now, you say you cannot even send troops? It seems your country has brought this tragedy upon us all.”

  Tragedy? The tragedy of all you guys losing your money! What a devastating tragedy!

  President Matthews was boiling with anger but knew better than to speak.

  Leaders from both teams were tucked away safely. Both teams barely mentioned civilian casualties or assisting in finding his daughter, and they wanted him to send a big troop of soldiers that would be no more than another big fat target for a suicide bomber. The terrorists where everywhere and in every nation, and hidden in civilian clothes. What in the Hell was a big troop of American soldiers going to be but target practice for a terrorist with a death wish? If they would have asked that the soldiers bring aid to the civilians, President Matthews would have considered, but nobody focused on anything but MONEY.

  Since his priority was finding his daughter and halting bloodshed on innocent civilians regardless of whether or not anyone’s money was returned, it was becoming clear there was no longer any reason for him to participate in their stupid little phony peace meeting.

  Had Ashley not been somewhere roaming around over there, he would have fired Haiku’s 500 atom drones that second and lit up all their greedy asses on fire, but that would have only killed innocent civilians. All the greedy bastards were tucked away safely underground. President Matthews knew he had better control his temper.

  “I will have my security team work as hard and as fast as possible to find the culprit who stole the money from your nations’ offshore bank accounts, Prime Minister Williams. For now, that is all I can offer as our troops are being required to quarantine 24 cities and counting. I request that we continue this meeting when I have more information I can provide for you.”

  “Request granted, Mr. President.”

  The screen went blank as the Freedom Forces disappeared as quickly as the No Surrender Squad.

  Only the Prime Minister of Japan stayed live.

  The United States and Japan had finally smoothed over relations as a result of Haiku’s groundbreaking technologies that he dedicated solely to both countries.

  “Would you like us to send soldiers to France to help you find your daughter, President Matthews?”

  “Thank you, Prime Minister Hayashi, but we have the only Japanese soldier we need.”

  Prime Minister Hayashi bowed his head as a response, proving he completely understood.

  Both leaders knew there was only one soldier who was better than a million and his name was Haiku Makanura.

  HAIKU THE HERO

  Haiku confirmed with President Matthews which French military base the United Nations supply shipments were using to hide the tunnel entrance.

  Since the en
trance Ashley had entered had long been sealed off, Haiku knew that fact meant one of two things. It was possible that a terrorist had kidnapped her by infiltrating the French military base. The French were trusting and humane enough to harbor the Syrian refugees after the bombing of Paris because those refugees were mostly women and children.

  While Haiku had the deepest respect for such a noble decision, he also knew that in times of war, mercy could lead to vulnerability.

  The second possibility, which Haiku had a gut feeling about, was that the highly intelligent and extremely stubborn young girl had escaped on her own.

  Being her Godfather, Haiku had trained Ashley up to be a formidable foe to anyone who crossed her; President Matthews had made sure of that. For such a reason, Haiku felt that even if the terrorists had apprehended her, if they were stupid enough to keep her alive as a bargaining chip, she would somehow wiggle her way out their grasp right beneath their very noses. Either way, there was only one route out of those tunnels and only two United Nations truck drivers authorized to deliver supplies.

  Thanks to Sam’s sprawling back yard that was completely obscured by a 12-foot-wooden privacy fence, he’d had the luxury of his own parking lot for his latest high-tech drones.

  He called them his hummingbirds.

  Tiny wings extended from either side of every drone, with motion that identically replicated that of a hummingbird. This motion allowed the drone to land in one location more precisely than a helicopter and as completely silent as a result of an electrically-powered and not a gas-powered engine.

  A team of NASA scientists had recently made major science headlines claiming they had stumbled upon the first light particles that traveled at velocities faster than the speed of light.

  Although the sound barrier had been broken decades before, it was the first instance in history that a particle’s velocity had measured to be faster than the speed of light.

  NASA scientists claimed they stumbled upon the remarkable breakthrough when they bounced laser light beams off a particle resonance chamber and measured the speed.